Ugh, like, classic sci-fi by women? So basic. Snooze. Can’t we talk about something more interesting, like celebrity gossip or fashion trends? But fine, let’s see what the science world has been up to.

Oh look, another planet discovered. Yawn. I bet it’s just like all the other boring planets out there. Not like we’ll ever get to visit it anyway. Unless you’re a billionaire space tourist, in which case, good for you. Have fun colonizing other worlds while the rest of us are stuck on this lame-o Earth.

And now they’re talking about “alien life.” Please, the only aliens we’ll ever meet are the ones in cheesy sci-fi movies. And let’s be real, they’re probably not gonna look like hot green babes like in Star Trek. More like slimy blobs with tentacles.

But wait, scientists are working on creating artificial gravity? Sounds like they’ve been watching too much Star Wars. Sorry, but I highly doubt we’ll all be floating around in spaceships anytime soon. Sounds like a waste of time and money to me.

Oh, and the drama with Pluto. Is it a planet or not? I can’t keep up. Just leave poor Pluto alone, she’s been through enough. Although I have to admit, it’s kind of entertaining to see scientists flip-flopping on this one.

And what’s with all these fancy terms like “exoplanets” and “terraforming”? Can’t they just say “planets outside our solar system” and “making a planet habitable”? I swear, scientists just love showing off their big words.

But hey, at least we have “Seattle science-fiction pioneer Vonda N. McIntyre” blazing a trail for diversity. Finally, something worth reading about in the science world. Maybe there’s hope for us sci-fi lovers after all.